Do you "LIKE" school ?

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Notes of Concern…

                               …Jackson Blair

Do You “Like” School?

Have you ever noticed how many adults will ask a child how he/she likes school?  We have created a scenario in which we seem to tell children they should “like” going to school.

Perhaps we adults are guilty of confirming a youngster’s belief that if he isn’t happy then something must be wrong.

I first started to think about this when I found a private school that used labor as a penalty for offenses against school rules. Specifically in this one case if you were caught smoking you were forced to dig a very large pit in the ground in which you would then bury a cigarette and refill the hole. I suppose there was some intent of reminding the young smoker that cigarettes can lead to death, and to a grave, but it all seemed pretty awful to me.

Since I have always believed labor should be ennobling, I found suggesting that work is a punishment went a little to far. We need to instill in kids that all work is good. It is not something to be avoided or shirked. And we should certainly not suggest that if they do something wrong the result is they get to work!

What a message that sends.

This unpleasant part of life at one school led me to further consideration of whether a child “liking” school is a proper goal.

And while I believe it is nice if going to school is also a pleasant experience and that a student is happy about learning, his happiness should not, in my opinion, be the focal point.

Schools should focus on learning.

And for learning to occur there has to be good teaching.

Good teaching, in turn, involves role modeling.

And all of it responds well to discipline and focus.

When all this happens in a way that everyone is happy it must be a wonderful thing. But if it happens in the absence of happiness it is still a good thing.

I think when schools get too involved in creating happiness, learning often does not occur at the high level one would hope. When sports, cheerleading, drama presentations, proms take precedence over “readin and writin and rithmetic” somehow everyone loses.

All of the extracurriculars have a place.

But it should never be “first place.”

When they are part of a total package that ensures some kind of learning is happening in every activity, from the classroom to the playing field, then the “whole” is structured in support of learning, of true education.

In my ideal school, there could only be one student leader.

One Captain of a team.

One President of a club.

Disappointment is a real part of life. Not getting promoted is a real occurrence. Everyone cannot receive the top prize or the prize loses value. In life, competition is always present and there are winners, also-rans, and losers. Isn’t that what should be taught in school?

When our students actually get out into the world they are not going to find two CEO’s of any company for which they work. They are not going to find two Police Chiefs or Fire Chiefs, or two Mayors.

To be sure people are happy we might have three team captains or co-presidents of the student council or two valedictorians.  It seems to me that you could have five team captains, a troika of presidents for the student council and five valedictorians and someone, or some many, would still have their feelings hurt.

I worked in a school where a headmaster often commented that it was not his job to make you happy. It was your job to find happiness. It was his job to run the school.

I can tell you that my experiences working for international financial organizations certainly never brought forward any CEO’s desire to be responsible for my happiness.

Education should be preparatory for real life.

Education should not be an attempt at creating fairy tale life.

When contemplating this column I was reminded of my first job out of college. I went to work at an all boys’ boarding school. A man known for a no-nonsense approach to education headed it. Decades later when he was the longest sitting school head in the country it was obvious that his model had worked well.

Let me share one story that illustrates what I am writing about.

One night, well into the evening, there was a knock at this Headmaster’s front door. He found a young lad there asking to see him. He led the student to his study and asked what was troubling him.

The student said he wanted to go home.

The Headmaster asked why.

The student responded that he was a smoker and found the rules against smoking too restricting. And he had a girlfriend back home with whom he would rather spend his time. Finally, he played in a rock band and he missed his band mates.

The Headmaster thought for a moment and then reached in his pocket and gave the lad a quarter. He then said something like this to the boy:

Son, take this quarter and go over to the payphone in the main building and call your parents. Ask them to be here no later than noon tomorrow to pick you up and take you home. You can spend the rest of tonight packing.

The shocked student, who probably expected to be talked out of his desire to leave, asked if he was being expelled. The Headmaster responded that he was not being expelled he was being permitted to leave, as requested. Then the Headmaster concluded with this statement:

If I were to list three things that have nothing to do with an education and which would be at the top of my list of things that should not be important to a person at this stage in life, my list could well include the three things you mentioned.

If those are so important to you that you would sacrifice the opportunity your family has provided for you to buckle down, focus and succeed then we have no place for you in this school.

The Headmaster escorted the lad to the door.

The quarter was never spent.

The parents never came.

The student never spoke of it again. Nor did the Headmaster.

Some forty years later, when the school was celebrating the Headmaster’s tenure, the young student about whom I have written was the speaker at the dinner. In addition, that student’s sons had later been placed under the tutelage of his old Headmaster.

Fairness is not more important than firmness when dealing with teenagers.

Straight talk and follow through make huge impressions on young people.

Happiness has very little to do with learning but can certainly be a by-product.

Forgiveness and understanding can season a decision but a decision must be based in the reality of the present and informed by the possible future result of the decision.

An education is an education. It is not a social experiment. It is not a happy day on the playground. It is hard work toward an important goal: being an educated person ready to face the challenges of life head on.

One definition of an education is:

…the act or process of imparting or acquiring general knowledge, developing the powers of reasoning and judgment, and generally of preparing oneself or others intellectually for mature life.

I hope the next time you want to have a conversation with a youngster about school you might ask questions like these:

Did you learn some new things at school today?

What did you learn today that you didn’t know when you left for school this morning?

Have you thought of ways you might be able to use what you learned in school today to be successful in life later on?

Maybe if you read more about what you are learning tonight when you return to school tomorrow you will surprise everyone with how much you have learned.

TEACHING IS NOT LIMITED TO THE SCHOOL.

TEACHABLE MOMENTS ARISE EVERY DAY.